Why PER is the chameleon of Italian prepositions

If you open a serious Italian grammar and look up per, you will find nine core meanings. Finality (lavoro per vivere), cause (non esco per la pioggia), duration (ho studiato per due ore), space (passo per Milano), means (ti chiamo per telefono), distribution (cinque euro per biglietto), exchange (vendo la bici per cento euro), predicative (ti prendono per matto), concessive (per quanto sia stanco).

Now forget them for a moment. What English learners actually meet every day in Italian is a second layer: fixed expressions where per glues a small phrase into one meaning unit, and the meaning is not predictable from the single words. Per un pelo does not mean “for a hair”, it means “by a whisker”. Per poco non cadevo does not mean “for little I did not fall”, it means “I nearly fell”.

This guide takes you through the main idiomatic families built around per, with a Milan-based dialog at the end so you hear them in a real conversation.

Per forza, per fortuna, per caso: the adverb family

This is the first family to learn because Italians drop these into almost every conversation. They behave like adverbs, they almost never change shape, and they attach to any clause.

• Per forza: of course, inevitably, necessarily. “Se piove, per forza resto a casa.” It also answers a rhetorical question: “Sei stanco?” “Per forza, ho dormito tre ore.”
• Per fortuna: luckily, thank goodness. “Per fortuna c’era un taxi libero.”
• Per caso: by chance, as it happens. “L’ho incontrato per caso al supermercato.” Also polite probing in questions: “Hai per caso una penna?”
• Per giunta / per di più: on top of that, and furthermore. Used to pile one reason onto another. “Era tardi, pioveva, e per giunta avevo dimenticato le chiavi.”
• Per carità: two registers. Sincere plea (please, for heaven’s sake: “Per carità, non dirglielo!”) or sarcastic disclaimer (heaven forbid: “Non è brutto, per carità, solo un po’ caro”).
• Per davvero: for real, seriously. “L’ha detto per davvero?”

A tu per tu and amici per la pelle: the intensity family

This family uses per to lock two elements together and signal maximum intensity of the relationship. They are high-frequency in spoken Italian and neutral register.

• A tu per tu: face to face, one on one, eyeball to eyeball. Used for private conversations and direct confrontations. “Voglio parlargli a tu per tu, non davanti a tutti.”
• Faccia a faccia: synonym of a tu per tu, slightly more physical.
• Amici per la pelle: friends for life, thick as thieves. Literally “friends to the skin”. “Io e Marta siamo amiche per la pelle dal liceo.”
• Uno per tutti, tutti per uno: the Three Musketeers motto, used seriously and jokingly.
• Mano nella mano: hand in hand, side by side in an effort. Not built with per but belongs to the same intensity family.
• Testa per testa: per head, used like “per persona” to distribute a cost. “Fanno venticinque euro testa per testa.”

Dare per scontato and prendere per buono: the perception family

Here per works as a predicative marker. It signals the mental category into which the speaker places a person, event or piece of information. English uses “as”, “for” or “to be”.

• Dare per scontato: to take for granted. “Ho dato per scontato che arrivassi in tempo.” Agreement: the past participle dato agrees with the direct object if pronominalized (“L’ho data per scontata”).
• Dare per morto / finito / perso: to write off, to assume dead/finished/lost. “Dopo due ore senza notizie, l’avevamo già dato per disperso.”
• Prendere per buono: to accept at face value. “Ho preso per buono quello che mi ha detto.”
• Prendere qualcuno per + adjective/noun: mistake someone for. “Mi hai preso per uno stupido?”
• Passare per: to come across as, to be mistaken for. “Con questo cappello passo per un turista.”
• Tenere qualcuno per + noun: formal synonym of prendere per. “Lo tengo per un galantuomo.”

Per filo e per segno, per un pelo, per poco non: the measurement family

This cluster is about precision and near-misses. Per marks a tiny quantity, a minimal margin, or an exhaustive level of detail.

• Per filo e per segno: in every detail, point by point, exhaustively. “Mi ha raccontato la storia per filo e per segno.”
• Per un pelo: by a hair, narrowly. “Ho preso il treno per un pelo.”
• Per poco non + imperfect or passato prossimo: nearly, almost (with the opposite verb polarity of English). “Per poco non cadevo” means “I nearly fell”, not “I did not almost fall”. The non is structural and does not negate.
• Per un soffio: synonym of per un pelo, slightly more literary.
• Per niente / per nulla: not at all. “Non mi piace per niente.”
• Per sempre: forever. “Ti amerò per sempre” is the canonical romantic cliché.

Stare per and essere per: the imminent future

This is not an idiom, it is a grammatical construction that behaves like one. Stare per + infinitive expresses an imminent action, something on the verge of happening. English uses “about to” or “on the point of”.

• Sto per uscire: I am about to go out.
• Il treno sta per partire: the train is about to leave.
• Stavo per dirtelo: I was about to tell you (common in apologies: I was going to, before you asked).
• Essere per + infinitive: formal synonym, rarely used in conversation. “Sono per andarmene” sounds literary.

Stare per uses only the present and imperfect in practice. You will not hear “sarò per uscire” or “sono stato per uscire”. The construction is aspectual, not temporal.

Per giunta, per di più, per l’appunto: the discourse markers

These per phrases do not describe events. They glue parts of a conversation together, signal the speaker’s attitude or organize the argument.

• Per giunta / per di più: furthermore, on top of that. Adds weight to a list of complaints or reasons.
• Per l’appunto: precisely, as it happens. Confirms a coincidence: “Stavo per chiamarti. Per l’appunto.” Formal register.
• Per così dire: so to speak, as it were. Hedging marker.
• Per modo di dire: figuratively speaking, in a manner of speaking. “È un amico, per modo di dire.”
• Per non parlare di: not to mention. “La casa è piccola, per non parlare del rumore.”
• Per quanto riguarda: as for, concerning. “Per quanto riguarda la proposta, ne parliamo lunedì.”

Prendere per i fondelli, per il naso: the informal family

These idioms belong to casual spoken Italian. Use them with friends and family, not in professional contexts.

• Prendere per i fondelli: to pull someone’s leg, to mock. Colloquial, mildly vulgar origin but widely accepted. “Mi stai prendendo per i fondelli?”
• Prendere per il naso: synonym, slightly softer. “Non farti prendere per il naso.”
• Prendere per il culo: vulgar equivalent, avoid in formal settings.
• Andare per le lunghe: to drag on. “La riunione sta andando per le lunghe.”
• Andare per la maggiore: to be in fashion, to be a trend. “Quella serie va per la maggiore.”
• Mandare a quel paese: to tell someone to get lost. Not built with per but belongs to the same informal register.

Common mistakes English speakers make with PER

1. Literal translation of for: English “for” splits in Italian between per (purpose/duration) and da (agent, origin). “The book was written by Ferrante” is scritto da Ferrante, not per Ferrante.
2. Per + infinitive vs a + infinitive: per + infinitive marks purpose (studio per imparare). Italian does not use “a” here, while Spanish does. Keep them separated.
3. Duration: per vs nothing: “Ho studiato due ore” and “Ho studiato per due ore” are both correct, the per adds a slight emphasis on the full stretch. But “I lived in Rome for three years” is sempre ho vissuto a Roma tre anni in colloquial Italian; avoid overloading with per.
4. Per poco non with affirmative English: English says “I nearly fell”, Italian says “Per poco non sono caduto” with non. Resist the temptation to drop the non.
5. Stare per vs sto per + past participle: stare per takes the infinitive, never the participle. “Sto per andato” is wrong; “sto per andare” is the form.
6. Per + noun as “because of”: Italians say “siamo arrivati tardi per il traffico” where English uses “because of”. Keep it simple: per + definite article + noun is the standard cause pattern.
7. Overusing per carità: it is strong. In business email, use “assolutamente no” or “ci mancherebbe” instead.

Dialog: Porta Romana, Milan

Laura (44, pediatrician) runs into her upstairs neighbour Tommaso (50, tax consultant) in the courtyard the evening after a near-miss on her bike. She is still shaking.

Cheat sheet: PER idiom map

🎯 Mini-challenge: six sentences to complete

Fill in each gap with the right PER idiom. Scroll the reveal to check.

1. Il treno ___ (is about to) partire, sbrighiamoci.
2. Ho preso l’ultimo posto ___ (by a hair).
3. Ti racconto tutto ___ (in every detail) appena ci vediamo.
4. ___ (I nearly) dimenticavo l’appuntamento dal dentista.
5. Lo davo ___ (for lost), invece è tornato ieri.
6. Non mi piace ___ (at all) come si comporta con te.

Milano course

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Small-group Italian where idioms stop being flashcards and become reflexes. Your coach drops per un pelo, per poco non and stare per into real dialogues until you deliver them without thinking.

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Related guides

• Italian verbs followed by the preposition A
• Italian verbs followed by the preposition DI
• Italian compound prepositions
• Italian double negatives